I haven't been in the house for five minutes, but after a little incident on the train earlier today, I felt strongly compelled to sit down and get this typed up. Now, I'm a pretty open-minded sort of guy, definitely one of the most patient bastards you're apt to meet. I've ridden on MARTA for years now, and have seen many things. I've also been an anime fan for many years now, and have seen many things. What just happened to me less than an hour ago has forced me to not only reevaluate my patience, but has single-handedly forced me to recalibrate my Weird Shit-O-Meter. Here we go.

It was a day not unlike any other that found me on campus turning in my final paper for Art History, and after spending some time grabbing lunch at Alley Cat (metal/punk bar) at Underground Atlanta, I decided to head on in. I take the short walk to Five Points station, don my headphones, and take a seat in order to wait for the next train.

Before I go any further, let me explain what I was wearing, as this has tremendous significance with what transpired next. About a year ago, Heather was visiting Tennessee and brought me back a black tee-shirt from one of the local anime clubs, the aptly named Anime Tennessee. While I'm not a member of said club, I do find myself wearing the shirt from time to time, as not only do I dig the design on it, but it is also quite comfy. Anywho, I'm sitting down waiting for the next train, and I see a heavyset thirty-ish woman in glasses is approaching. We make eye contact, and I, being the decent human being that I am, smile in acknowledgement.

Big mistake.

She seemed very interested in my shirt, and the first words out of her mouth when she saw it was "ANIME!" Granted, that WAS the only part visible at the time, as my book bag was covering the Tennessee portion of the logo. Knowing full well that a lot of my convention-attending brothers and sisters are not fully versed in the techniques of social interaction, I move the book bag aside so she can see the whole logo. She first mentions Anime Weekend Atlanta, and we talk about that for a brief moment, and she follows up with a mention of an upcoming convention in Tennessee. "You might want to check it out," she suggested. "I hear that Danger Woman is supposed to be there. The internet's been buzzing about it!"

At that point a small alarm goes off in my head. Nothing too loud, but there was a ringing nonetheless. Memories started to come back to me, as I recalled hearing about a woman that frequents Dragon*Con and other local conventions, claiming to be a superhero. Not a problem, I think. This woman's obviously a fan and is just trying to make conversation with someone that she feels is a kindred spirit. I can respect that. I continue with the idle banter and mention that yes, I had indeed heard about Danger Woman.

Big mistake #2.

At this point, this woman gets INTO the story. She's telling me about Danger Woman's arch-nemesis and why she's after her, the fact that she's an orphan ("Hey, most of the great heroes are orphans!" I remark with a smile), and then starts getting into her pets. "And the best part about it," she informed me. "Is that no one knows who she really is! She's got a secret identity!"

At that point, the alarm in my head starts blazing. I'm starting to remember more and more about this Danger Woman character, and the fact that an individual fitting the description of the lass before me is the main one behind the stories. A realization suddenly dawned on me that I was indeed speaking with the woman herself. And heaven help us all, she's a little bit less than sane. The train pulls up and we board. I'm quietly thinking that the amount of people on the car would end up being a deterrent for us to continue this conversation. She finds a seat, and enthusiastically calls me over, informing me that she saved one for me. I decide why not, and plop down next to her.

Big mistake #3.

Now, it's a little bit after six at this point, which meant that the train was pretty crowded. This did not stop her, as she continues to tell me about Danger Woman's pets, and QUITE LOUDLY to boot. The doors close, and the realization dawned on me that, if this woman was going to the same stop as me, I'd be listening to her for the next half hour or so. Hell, with my luck, they'd be single-tracking down the line, which could easily up that to 45 minutes. I smile and nod while throwing in the random tidbit from time to time, but my mind is racing on finding an escape route. Suddenly, I hear a voice over the intercom.

"The next stop is Georgia State, Georgia State Station..."

I grab my book bag and smile. "Well, this looks like my stop... it was nice talking to you!"

Never mind the fact that my true destination was actually eight stops later down the line. I'd be content to wait for the next train. I had made a quick tally of my mental state, and there was no way in hell that I could have kept up with that conversation. She waves as I duck off. "Don't forget to tell your friends about Danger Woman!" she calls after me.

Oh trust me, I think as I wave back. Everyone's going to hear about this one.